My Job

Mixed feelings - the two words that can best describe how I feel about the thing that has changed the way I thought my life is going to be...
I love it when I get the freedom of being creative, meeting new people, trying out different things, seeing new places, and most of all the company that I have currently around me...
I hate it when I get questioned on my way of thinking, when I made to feel I am not good enough, when bureaucracy creeps into the system... when I feel like I am been hanged because someone else's mistakes, when communication channels are closed - just because people feel they have something better to do... and most of all when the time I give is not appreciated and how much ever you do, you are still made to feel that you haven't done enough....
If I weight what I have just written, I feel what I am still doing here???
But like someone said to me the other day,"Its your first job, you will always feel like you can live with it", - so I have decided to live with it... because whatever little I have seen of other corporates is that - "this is not the place for me, I belong somewhere else...".
So when I am resigning from my job - the answer is, "when I have nothing to list down in the likes para...".

CLUELESS...

I am currently clueless.... some may say as always, but I know that it feels different this time.
I don't know where I am heading... period.
I always knew the hard truth that everything does not go "my way" - but when its actually happening I am clueless about how to deal with it...
Speak to friends - they do understand ... give me ways to get out of it... believe in me, but I don't believe in me...
Speak to family - they don't understand... they remind me of how things have been hard and how I should learn to deal with it...
So after all the brooding where do I stand - CLUELESS...